“If you can’t get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you’d best teach it to dance.” – George Bernard Shaw
I wouldn’t describe myself as a simple farm boy who gets swept up in an epic story of romance and heroism to become the stuff of campfire legend.
There have been plenty of successful revolutions of late, with dictators across the Middle East being upended left right and centre. Not all revolutionaries did quite so well however, so if you want an idea of how to dethrone your leader, don’t do what these guys did.
I wouldn’t describe myself as dynamic, interesting, exciting, gregarious, funny, clever, talented, dog lover… what’s the opposite of sarcastic?
“Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.”
- Winston Churchill
I do not sleep with my clients or watch them have sex.
I’m not the Grim Reaper.
I’m not a born again Christian vegan activist hipster marathon runner who drives an El Camino. I hate El Caminos.
I am not a drugstore pharmacist. I don’t even look like a pharmacist – no white coat.
I’m not interested in changing the mind of anyone who doesn’t like technology, I just want to help those with a sparkle of curiosity to see what joys lie within our geeky little world, and help those self-confessed nerds know they’re not alone and help them find their networks and collaborators, wherever they may be.
I wouldn’t describe myself as apathetic, judgmental, or dull. I’m not modest or self-conscious about my body. I’m not close-minded. I’m not dressed a lot of the time, especially in the summer.
I am not a casket salesman. I do not attempt to make a funeral into a retail transaction.
Are you huddled in a dark lair, plotting to get back at your arch-nemisis? Careful – more often than not, revenge goes horribly, horribly wrong for all concerned. Read on to understand how not to wreak vengeance in the antiguide to revenge: what not to do.
“I believe every human has a finite number of heartbeats. I don’t intend to waste any of mine.”
– Neil Armstrong
Who am I not? Oh I suppose normally socially-connected…whatever the hell that means these days. I was born in 1934 and I ended up with no parents and lost a sister all in the 1940s… I mean the normal social connections then would have been family and friends! We never had them as a person, so it has taken us all this time to try to develop those relationships, because you’ve got to have them otherwise you end up with the Aurora Shootings.
Now that’s complicated enough now isn’t it!
I’m not a beautiful hypocrite lost for words.
What am I not? My mother, who always wanted a girly girl, hates that I play roller derby.
Instead of the sweet, mild-mannered, preacher’s wife daughter she dreamed of, she ended up with a daughter who enjoys beating up on girls twice her size. I’m a dream crusher.
First Dog on the Moon isn’t really comfortable talking about himself in the third person however he will endeavor to do so for the benefit of this sentence he is writing.
I am not a fighter, I’m also not a winner very much, but I am a lover, and have frequently been a sinner (I do work in the arts after all…). I am not a sports-capable person, but I do enjoy cutting a rug; I am not outgoing, but I love being with friends; I am not a vegetarian, although I once was; and I am not normal, but neither are any of my friends
Jen Brister isn’t Jen Christer, Jan Bristow, Jean Britzen, Joan Brasten or Jane Bester. All names I have been referred to one way or another over the years. My favourite was when I ordered 2000 Edinburgh flyers for my show that read, ‘Ben Brister.’ Continue Reading →